The telescope of his mind was thin and narrow, and he was trapped. He was Remi, he knew, and he was alone. The marbled walls were pink and glistening wetly, a sheen of something slick and slimy clinging to the surface. He avoided touching them for fear of transferring that marbled slick onto his hands—did he have hands? He looked carefully at them, studying the slender fingers, cocking his head. Were those hands? He didn’t know… What were hands, anyways? Was there anybody around to tell him? Who even knew?



Not him, that was for sure.

All he did know was one thing: he was Remi. Remi was him. Remi lived here, so that meant he lived here, did it not? So why did this place look so unfamiliar? He walked slowly up the hall, looking every which way in a fruitless search for an exit. Minutes, or hours, passed. He didn’t know which.

A grotesque crow fluttered past him, perching on nothing but empty air. It cocked its head and peered beadily at him, letting out a loud screech and beating its wings. It did not move, and neither did Remi. They stared at each other.

“Look at yourself!” it screamed, voice shrill and reminiscent of a nagging older mother. “God, just take a look at yourself! God! God! God!” Feathers burst in his face and the crow flapped away, shedding feathers from its rotting flesh with every flap of its bedraggled wings. Slowly, Remi looked down at himself, the shouts of the crow still echoing in his head.

He was skinny, naked, and… a vine of purpled bruises dotted up his inner arm, and… oh… his arm? Remi’s head swam. Mmm… he moaned, stumbling. The floor vibrated, sending him tipping off to one side, and he fell against the wall. His hands splayed out, catching himself, and he waited for the world to steady itself. What was that? What had just happened? His retinas were stinging.

There was no other choice available to him but to walk with his hands sliding over the wall for balance, because every few paces the floor would jerk and bounce. It was as though this place did not want him going down this way, and every few steps he would hear the crow again (“God! God! Just look at yourself!”), and see its bloody feathers scattered on the floor.

He ran after it, ran and ran until he came into a bigger expanse of hall, a sort of room in the middle of it almost like a lobby with no doors. The crow could still be heard, but was it real, or in his head?

 The ceiling here opened up into a sort of atrium, and above him, just beyond his reach, was a balcony, and a spindly ladder stretching up to a hatch, which surely must lead out of here. On the balcony rail perched the crow, gazing down at him and still emitting its screeching cries. If only he could climb up… 

He would try, he had to. Against the wall, Remi’s hands scrabbled for purchase, but hapless, he sank to his knees and screamed. Like the walls, the floor, too, was pink, with a gross grayish hue to it. The ceiling too, and a clear, viscous fluid oozed between smooth folds, falling in thick drips to puddle around Remi. Miraculously, none of it touched him. 

“Somebody help me!” he screeched, voice cracking. “Please!”

“God! Just look at yourself! God!” 

The smell of this place was rancid, cloying. It gathered in his head and in his lungs, heady, until he was all but intoxicated on the ill sensation in his gut. Airflow quickened in his lungs and he drew in a sharp, gasping breath and let it all out again in a rapid huff, and did so over and over until his thoughts were mushed and fuzzy around the edges. A hoarse yell escaped him and he collapsed forward, sprawling out face-first onto the waxy floor. He could stay and melt here, he thought, just lay and melt away and die…

“God! God!”

He screamed again. 

“Noisy, ain’t ya?” asked a nasally little voice.

Remi rolled onto his back, the air stopping completely. A warped little creature hunched beside his face, its blank white eyes overlarge and bulging in their jagged sockets, its cracked gray skin stretched taut over the fleshless, skeletal frame of its trembling body. As he stared, it leered at him, showing off a mouthful of pristine white, horrifyingly human teeth. Just behind them, almost hidden, was a double-row of thin saber-like fangs, glinting sharp like bone needles in the faintly emanating light of the hallway. Its eight-fingered hands reached for him.

“I’ll shut ya up, doncha worry…”

But Remi was scrambling to his feet, lurching away down the endless hall, breath still frozen in his lungs, running until he thought he may pass out—or pass away. Far behind him, the gaunt little creature had faded back into the wall, never existing, leaving only the grinning whisper of a threat. The crow dove down from the balcony rail, beat its wings frantically, banked, and soared after him. Remi flinched, anticipating attack, but the massive crow flew right past his head and out of sight.

Remi slowed to a halt, gasping, with tears born of exhaustion and blind terror streaming down his flushed cheeks in thin rivulets. Beastly footsteps echoed around him, and his lagging brain did not register the sound, but his thrumming heart felt as though it might burst. Were those his own, or… other? 

A sort of breeze fluttered past, toying at the lank strands of hair that had fallen over his face, and raising goosebumps on his lean body. It carried with it more of that rank stench.

In an attempt to escape, he took up a brisk pace, though his feet suddenly weighed three tons each and his heart rate had yet to calm. After an excruciatingly long minute, he came to an end, which startled him. There was an end to this wretched hall? To his right, there was only a blank expanse of the same grotesque wall, but to his left was… another hall.

This hallway, too, seemed to stretch on forever. This hallway, though, was lined with doors, their knobs all shining, sweet and innocent, though there was no obvious light in this hallway. Remi grasped desperately at each doorknob, but each door was locked. He let out a miserable dry sob but went on, persistent in his efforts to find an open door, to find that blissful escape. 

There was none.

Rage exploded through him, through his very veins and the pure essence of his soul, drowning every last thought and vision until all he could see was a wash of pulsating scarlet and the plain door directly in front of him, which he punched and bruised his knuckles on, dark flowers of bruises to complement the ones on his inner arm.

Something cawed, and Remi spun around to see the crow, its cruel beak barely three inches from his face. He let out a startled cry and lurched backwards, and the crow cawed again. It cocked its head one way, then the other, never taking its eyes off him, and as they stared at each other, a couple more feathers dropped from its body. It flapped its wings, ghosting a draft, and flew off again, over his head and out of sight. Remi’s heart was pounding.

Why? 

What was that crow?

“Rëni…” A voice floated past his ear, carrying a sort of breeze with it, and Remi whirled around. There was nobody there, only the dark recesses of the hall he had just walked down.

“Hello?” he asked suspiciously.

“Rëni!”

Remi looked around, twisting his head this way and that. There was nobody behind him. He spun back around, gritting his teeth, and there—

“Rëni,” the boy repeated. He hung upside-down—no, he was sitting primly on the ceiling, smirking at him. Choppy black hair fell across his face, casting shadows over narrowed pink eyes.

“My name is Remi,” Remi said. “Not Rëni.” He took a step backwards, keeping a wary eye on this sudden stranger.

“My name is Remi,” the boy echoed. Remi wasn’t quite sure if he was mocking him or not.

“No, it’s not,” Remi snapped, annoyance sparking through him. “That’s my name.”

The boy sulked. He tipped his head to one side, then the other. “You’re no fun, Remi.”

Remi sighed. “Tell me who you are. Now.”

“I’m Rëni,” the upside-down boy said, frowning. He leaned in closer and studied his face. “Don’t you remember me?”

“No,” Remi said shortly. “Why do you do that?” Rëni looked at him, clueless. “Sit like that. Why do you sit like that?”

“Why don’t you?” Rëni countered, crossing his arms. “I think better like this. I’m too dizzy to stand upside-down, like you do,” he said, looking Remi critically up and down. “You really don’t recognize me?”

“Of course I recognize you,” Remi replied, shaking his head. “You look just like me! But I don’t know who you are.”

“Yes, you do,” Rëni said dismissively. “Of course you do. You really aren’t funny, Remi, you never are… Anyways,” he went on, “have you seen Ambi?”

“Ambi?” Remi echoed.

Rëni rolled his eyes. “Yes, Ambi. Don’t tell me you don’t remember her, either.”

If somebody were to slit his wrist right now, Remi thought, he would surely bleed agitation. “I’ve told you,” he said hotly, “I can’t remember anything besides my own name. Are you going to help me or not?”

“Okay,” Rëni drawled. Disbelief was etched in his face. “Follow me, then.” He stood up. His feet never once left the ceiling as he led Remi down the hallway. Rising from the black shadows, veins of a strange, purpled substance stretched tautly across the hall before them in a web. Remi put a hand out to sweep it aside, and found it to be damp and gummy, clinging like thought to the damp of his skin. He shook it off and pushed through with a grimace, and looked up at Rëni.

“Where are you taking me?” he demanded, feeling as though he were shouting at the floor.

“Out,” Rëni replied. “Isn’t that where you wanted to go? Out?”

It was, but they were passing the gleaming doors, their knobs all polished and beautifully unlocked. He reached out for one, only for Rëni to take his outstretched hand and yank him away. They sprinted down the hall, past the smattering of doors and the strange web, until Remi’s eyes were streaming and he was choking for air. He faltered once, and Rëni yanked his arm, forcing him along. Remi didn’t even know if he was wearing shoes—he peered down, but if he had feet, he couldn’t see them. No matter how much they hurt.

“Please!”

“Quit your whining,” Rëni snapped. “Ambi. I’m taking you to Ambi. She knows the way out.”

Ambi. Ambi, Ambi, Ambi… The name repeated in his head like a mantra. Ambi, she could save him… Would she? Would she at least tell him where he was? Finally, they turned through a doorway, and Remi almost let out a cry of relief. But it was not an exit they were going into, but rather a large room with no walls, a speckled gray floor and a black void of a ceiling.

Ambi was a girl of slight figure; her form flowed like water with every movement. Lavender waves tumbled over one shoulder, and the other half of her head was shaved. Her eye on that side was a clear, light gold, and the other was a pupilless, swirled orb of milky silver. There was a mottled scar down the bridge of her nose, stretching across her left cheek. Her dress was sleek but ruffled in the skirt, not by design but by careless disuse. She pranced towards them, moving on her toes, and when she was within three feet of them, she stopped and smiled primly.

“Ambi,” she said solemnly, stretching out a hand to shake. Remi eyed it warily, and did not move. Above him, Rëni leered and walked along the absent ceiling. The entire lower half of his body seemed to be missing, black smoke curling at his chest. 

“Rëni,” he mimicked, stretching a hand out to an invisible acquaintance. Ambi scowled up at him, and Rëni laughed. “Girl, he doesn’t want to touch you. Go on, Remi,” and he drawled the name like a fake, “Tell her what you really, really want.”

“How do I get out of here?” he burst out, lunging forward and grabbing the front of her dress in clenched fists. Ambi recoiled. 

“Let go of me, and I’ll tell you.” So he did, and Ambi backed away, dusting herself off. She turned that scowl onto him, and it was remarkable how it twisted her entire face, that mottled scar distorting her otherwise pretty visage. “Never touch me again,” she bit out, taking yet another step back. She looked at him like she would a particularly nasty thing. Remi didn’t like it.

“I’m sorry. Please,” he tried, “how do I get out?”

She glowered at him for another moment, then turned away entirely. She danced along several steps and stopped, just underneath where Rëni stood, watching. 

“Do you even know where you are?”

“No.”

“Hm. Then how should I trust that you truly want to get out?” She turned a critical eye on him.

“I’ll do anything. Please, just get me out. I want to go home.”

“Oh, but Remi,” she whispered, voice carrying through the still air. “You are home. You are more home than you have ever been.”

“What do you mean?”

“Darling, you’re inside yourself.” He looked desperately at her, uncomprehending. Her eyes narrowed to slits, and she sneered. “You’re in your head, sweet Remi. This—” she spread her arms out in a grand gesture, “—is all you, baby. Don’t like it? Then change it.”

“But I don’t know how!” Remi cried, increasingly agitated. “Can’t you tell me?”

“No,” she said, “but I can take you to where you need to be.” He nodded swiftly, and Ambi took his hand. Rëni stretched his out without a word, merely an empty leer, and she took his as well. Remi blinked, and when his eyes opened again they were back in the hallway where he first began. His jaw dropped. 

“What? But this—”

“Is where you need to be,” Rëni interrupted. “Isn’t that right, Ambi?”

“Yes. Do hurry, won’t you? I get bored waiting.” She leaned back against the slimy wall, pouting at him. 

“But what do I do?” Neither one answered him. Remi stared desperately between them but it was pointless. He turned, paced along the length of the floor, and spun on his heel to pace back. When he looked up again, Rëni was staring at him with a curved little grin edging at his lips, and Ambi was neutral, solemn. Silence stretched between them, broken after a long moment by the raucous cawing of that damned crow. He turned to face it as it flew towards him, wingspan wider than he had ever seen, talons outstretched… aimed for his eyes.

He dodged, shouting out, and Rëni was laughing. Ambi was silent, but she backed away. The crow circled, crying out, and Remi recognized it now as a warning cry. Or was it a war cry? It looped, and wheeled towards him again with its talons out, and he dropped to the floor. Remi cowered, seething, as the crow flapped away, and it made no moves to come near him again. Remi rose to his feet once more, but…

The floor was spiraling beneath him; he was stumbling, reaching for anything to hold on to, but Ambi danced away from his touch with a bout of guttural laughter. The crow soared circles around their heads, screeching at the top of its lungs. On the ceiling, Rëni snickered, stretching his hands up—down?—above his head, fingers splayed.

“It is coming!” he cried out in elation. “It is coming!”

“Wha— what? What’s coming?” Remi spluttered, swaying where he stood. “What’s going on? Why am I…?”

“The injection!” Ambi gasped, throwing her arms up so her outstretched hands brushed Rëni’s, rotating slowly on the spot. “Oh, it is coming!”

Rëni seized her hands, hefting her up with nary a grunt of effort, and she flipped her fluid body to sit cross-legged on the ceiling with Rëni. The pair of them both leered down at Remi. He paced, panting, fisting at thin air and wishing he had something, anything, to get a grip on. Everything was spinning… The crow flew tighter loops around him. Everything was shrinking… No, the walls were closing in; his own mind was attempting to squeeze him out…

Is this what it was to be claustrophobic?

“Look out, look out!” they jeered in unison. “Look out, look out! Here it comes!”

But there was nowhere to go, there was nowhere he could run to, and even so, his legs were trembling and numb, about to give out. Distantly, he could hear rushing, but was it real, or just in his head?

Fool, he remembered. You are in your head!

“God! God!”

“Look out!”

“God! God!”

“It is coming!”

“God! God!”

“Here it comes!”

“God! God!”

A tide was coming, surely, that was what they were squawking about so jubilantly. That was the source of that god-awful sound. A tide was coming, and there it was…! Waves of milky silver bearing down upon him, and Ambi and Rëni were gliding their fingers through it like silk. It caught him, tossing him up and down and all about, drowning him, filling his lungs and choking his veins and everything should have been going dark, but it was all sheer white…